haye crept into an alderman's thumb ring: a plague of sighing and grief! it blows a man up like a bladder. There's villanous news abroad: here was Sir John Bracy from your father; you must to the court in the morning. That same mad fellow of the north, Percy; and he of Wales, that gave Amaimon the bastinado, and made Lucifer cuckold, and swore the devil his true liegeman upon the cross of a Welsh hook,--what a plague call you him? Poins. O, Glendower. Fal. Owen, Owen; the same;-and his son-inlaw, Mortimer; and old Northumberland; and that sprightly Scot of Scots, Douglas, that runs o' horseback up a hill perpendicular. P. Hen. He that rides at high speed, and with his pistol kills a sparrow flying. Fal. You have hit it. P. Hen. So did he never the sparrow. Fal. Well, that rascal hath good mettle in him; he will not run. P. Hen. Why, what a rascal art thou then, to praise him so for running! Fal. O' horseback, ye cuckoo! but, afoot, he will not budge a foot. P. Hen. Yes, Jack, upon instinct. Fal. I grant ye, upon instinct. Well, he is there too, and one Mordake, and a thousand blue caps more; Worcester is stolen away by night; thy father's beard is turned white with the news; you may buy land now as cheap as stinking mackarel. P. Hen. Then 'tis like, if there come a hot June, and this civil buffeting hold, we shall buy maidens as they buy hobnails, by the hundreds. Fal. By the mass, lad, thou say'st true; it is like, we shall have good trading that way. But, tell me, Hal, art thou not horribly afeard? thou being heir apparent, could the world pick thee out three such enemies again, as that fiend Douglas, that spirit Percy, and that devil Glendower? Art thou not horribly afraid? doth not thy blood thrill at it? P. Hen. Not a whit, i' faith; I lack some of thy instinct. Fal. Well, thou wilt be horribly chid to-morrow, when thou comest to thy father: if thou love me, practise an answer. Enter HOSTESS. Host. O, my lord, my lord! Fal. Heigh, heigh! the devil rides upon a fiddlestick: What's the matter? Host. The sheriff and all the watch are at the door: they are come to search the house: shall I let them in? Fal. Dost thou hear, Hal? never call a true piece of gold, a counterfeit: thou art essentially mad, without seeming so. P. Hen. And thou a natural coward, without instinct. Fal. I deny your major: if you will deny the sheriff, so; if not, let him enter: if I become not a cart as well as another man, a plague on my bringing up! I hope, I shall as soon be strangled with a halter, as another. P. Hen. Call in the sheriff. [Exit HOSTESS.] Go, hide thee behind the arras ;-the rest walk up above. Now, my masters, for a true face and a good conscience. Fal. Both which I have had: but their date is out, and therefore I'll hide me. [Exeunt FALSTAFF, BARDOLPH, GADSHILL, and PETO. Enter SHERIFF, and Two TRAVEllers, P. Hen. Now, master Sheriff; what's your will with me? Sher. First, pardon me, my lord. A hue and cry hath followed certain men into this house. P. Hen. What men? Sher. One of them is well known, my gracious lord; a gross fat man. Trav. As fat as butter. P. Hen. Sheriff, I do engage my word to thee, Sher. I will, my lord: Here are two gentlemen men, He shall be answerable; and so, farewell. Sher. Good night, my noble lord. P. Hen. I think it is good morrow; is it not? Sher. Indeed, my lord, I think it be two o'clock. [Exeunt SHERIFF and TRAVELLERS. P. Hen. This oily rascal is known as well as Paul's: go, call him forth. Poins. Falstaff! -Fast asleep behind the arras, and snorting like a horse. P. Hen. Hark, how hard he fetches breath! search his pockets. [POINS goes out and searches his Pockets.] What hast thou found? Enter POINS. Poins. Nothing but papers, my lord. P. Hen. Let's see what they be: read them. Item, sauce, 4d. Item, sack, two gallons, 5s. 8d. Item, anchovies and sack after supper, 2s. 6d. Item, bread, a halfpenny. P. Hen. O monstrous! but one halfpennyworth of bread to this intolerable deal of sack!-What there is else, keep close; we'll read it at more advantage: there let him sleep till day. I'll to the court in the morning: we must all to the wars, and thy place shall be honourable. I'll procure this fat rogue a charge of foot; and, I know, his death will be a march of twelve score. The money shall be paid back again, with advantage. Be with me betimes in the morning; and so good morrow, Poins. Poins. Good morrow, good my lord, [Exeunt, ACT THE THIRD, SCENE I The Presence Chamber. KING HENRY, HENRY PRINCE OF WALES, PRINCE JOHN, EARL OF WESTMORELAND, SIR WALTER BLUNT, and other GENTLEMEN, discovered. K. Hen. Lords, give us leave; the Prince of Wales and I Must have some private conference: but be near I know not whether Heaven will have it so, He'll breed revengement and a scourge for me; Make me believe, that thou art only mark'd P. Hen. So please your majesty, I would, I could Quit all offences with as clear excuse, As well as, I am doubtless, I can purge I may, for some things true, wherein my youth K. Hen. Heaven pardon thee!-Yet, let me wonder, Harry, At thy affections, which do hold a wing Of all the court, and princes of my blood. That men would tell their children, "This is he !" |