Glumdalclitch happened to be out of order: for I foon began to be known and esteemed among the greatest officers, I fuppofe more upon account of their majefties favour than any merit of my own. In journies, when I was weary of the coach, a fervant on horfeback would buckle on my box, and place it upon a cushion before him; and there I had a full profpect of the country on three fides from my three windows. I had in this clofet a field-bed and a hammock hung from the cieling, two chairs, and a table, neatly fcrewed to the floor, to prevent being tolled about by the agitation of the horfe or the coach. And having been long ufed to fea-voyages, thofe motions, although fometimes very violent, did not much difcompofe me.

Whenever I had a mind to see the town, it was always in my travelling-clofet, which Glumdalclitch held in her lap in a kind of open fedan, after the fashion of the country, borne by four men, and attended by two others in the queen's livery. The people, who had often heard of me, were very curious to crowd about the fedan; and the girl was complaifant enough to make the bearers ftop, and to take me in her hand that I might be more conveniently feen.

I was very defirous to fee the chief temple, and particularly the tower belonging to it, which is reckoned the higheft in the kingdom. Accordingly one day my nurfe carried me thither, but I may truly fay I came back disappointed; for the height is not above three thoufand feet, reckoning from the ground to the highest pinnacle top; which, allowing for the difference between the fize of thofe people and us in Europe, is no great matter for admiration, nor at all equal in proportion (if I rightly remember) to Salisbury fteeple. But, not to detract from a nation to which during my life I fhall acknowledge myself extremely obliged, it must be allowed that whatever this famous tower wants in height is amply made up in beauty and frength. For the walls are near an hundred feet thick, built of hewn stone, whereof each is about forty feet square, and adorned on all fides with Itatues of gods and emperors cut in marble larger than the life, placed in their feveral niches. I measured a little finger which had fallen down from one of thefe ftatues, and lay unperceived among fome rubbish, and found it exactly four feet and an inch in length. Glumdalelitch wrapped it up in her handkerchief, and

carried it home in her pocket, to keep among other trinkets, of which the girl was very fond, as children at her age ufually are.

The king's kitchen is indeed a noble building, vaulted at top, and about fix hundred feet high. The great oven is not fo wide by ten paces as the cupola at St. Paul's: for I measured the latter on purpofe after my return. But if I fhould defcribe the kitchen-grate, the prodigious pots and kettles, the joints of meat turning on the fpits, with many other particulars, perhaps I fhould be hardly believed; at leaft a fevere critic would be apt to think I enlarged a little, as travellers are often fufpected to do. To avoid which cenfure, I fear I have run too much into the other extreme; and that if this treatife should happen to be tranflated into the language of Brobdingnag (which is the general name of that kingdom) and tranfmitted thither, the king and his people would have reafon to complain, that I had done them an injury by a falfe and diminutive reprefentation.

His majefty feldom keeps above fix hundred horfes in his ftables: they are gene rally from fifty-four to fixty feet nigh. But, when he goes abroad on folemn days, he is attended for ftate by a militia quird of five hundred horfe, which indeed I thought was the moft fplendid fight that could be ever beheld, till I faw part of his army in battalia, whereof I thall find another occafion to speak.

CHAP. V.

Several adventures that happened to the author. The execution of a criminal. The author fheros his fkill in navigation.

I fhould have lived happy enough in that country, if my littleness had not expofed me to feveral ridiculous and troublefome accidents: fome of which I thall venture to relate. Glumdalclitch often carried me into the gardens of the court in my fmaller box, and would fometimes take me out of it, and hold me in her hand, or fet me down to walk. I remember, before the dwarf left the queen, he followed us one day into thofe gardens, and my nurfe having fet me down, he and I being clofe together, near fome dwarf app e-trees, I must needs fhew my wit by a filly allufion between him and the trees, which happens to hold in their language as it doth in ours. Whereupon the malicious rogue, watching 3 M3

his

his opportunity, when I was walking under one of them, fhock it directly over my head, by which a dozen apples, each of them as large as a Bristol barrel, came tumbling about my ears; one of them hit me on the back as I chanced to ftoop, and knocked me down flat on my face; but I received no other hurt, and the dwarf was pardoned at my defire, because I had given the pro

vocation.

Another day Glumdalclitch left me on a fmooth grafs-plat to divert myself, while the walked at fome distance with her governess. In the mean time there fuddenly fell fuch a violent fhower of hail, that I was immediately by the force of it ftruck to the ground: and when I was down, the hailftones gave me fuch cruel bangs all over the body, as if I had been pelted with tennis-balls; however, I made thift to creep on all four, and fhelter myself by lying flat on my face, on the lee-fide of a border of lemon thyme, but fo bruifed from head to foot, that I could not go abroad in ten days. Neither is this at all to be wondered at, because nature in that country, obferving the fame proportion through all her operations, a hail-ftone is near eighteen hundred times as large as one in Europe, which I can affert upon experience, having been fo curious to weigh and measure

them.

But a more dangerous accident happened to me in the fame garden, when my little nurfe believing she had put me in a fecure place, which I often intreated her to do, that I might enjoy my own thoughts, and having left my box at home to avoid the trouble of carrying it, went to another part of the garden with her governefs, and fome ladies of her acquaintance. While fhe was abfent, and out of hearing, a fmall white fpaniel belonging to one of the chief gardeners, having got by accident into the garden, happened to range near the place where I lay the dog, following the fcent, came directly up, and taking me in his mouth ran ftrait to his mafter, wagging his tail, and fet me gently on the ground. By good fortune he had been fo well taught, that I was carried between his teeth without the leaft hurt, or even tearing my clothes. But the poor gardener, who knew me well, and had a great kindness for me, was in a terrible fright: he gently took me up in both his hands, and afked me how I did; but I was so amazed and out of breath, that I could not speak a word. In a few minutes I came to myself, and he carried

me fafe to my little nurse, who by this time had returned to the place where the lefs me, and was in cruel agonies when I did not appear, nor anfwer when the called: fhe feverely reprimanded the gardener on account of his dog. But the thing was hufhed up, and never known at court; for the girl was afraid of the queen's anger; and truly, as to myself, I thought it would not be for my reputation that such a story fhould go about.

This accident abfolutely determined Glumdalclitch never to trust me abroad for the future out of her fight. I had been long afraid of this refolution, and therefore concealed from her fome little unlucky adventures that happened in those times when I was left by myfelf. Once a kite, hovering over the garden, made a stoop at me, and if I had not refolutely drawn my hang. er, and run under a thick efpalier, he would have certainly carried me away in his talons. Another time, walking to the top of a fresh mole-hill, I fell to my neck in the hole through which that animal had caft up the earth, and coined fome lye, not worth remembering, to excufe myself for spoiling my clothes. I likewife broke my right thin againft the fhell of a frail, which I happened to ftumble over, as I was walking alone, and thinking on poor England.

I cannot tell, whether I was more pleased or mortified to obferve in those folitary walks, that the smaller birds did not appear to be at all afraid of me, but would hop about me within a yard's distance, looking for worms and other food with as much indifference and fecurity, as if no creature at all were near them. I remem ber, a thrush had the confidence to fnatch out of my hand, with his bill, a piece of cake that Glumdalclitch had juft given me for my breakfast. When I attempted to catch any of these birds, they would boldly turn against me, endeavouring to peck my fingers, which I durft not venture within their reach; and then they would hop back unconcerned to hunt for worms or fails, as they did before. But one day I took a thick cudgel, and threw it with all my ftrength fo luckily at a linnet, that I knocked him down, and feizing him by the neck with both my hands, ran with him in triumph to my nurse. However the bird, who had only been ftunned, recovering himself, gave me fo many boxes with his wings on both fides of my head and body, though I held him at arm's

length,

length, and was out of the reach of his claws, that I was twenty times thinking to let him go. But I was foon relieved by one of our fervants, who wrung off the bird's neck, and I had him next day for dinner by the queen's command. This linnet, as near as I can remember, feemed to be fomewhat larger than an English fwan.

The maids of honour often invited Glumdalclitch to their appartments, and defired she would bring me along with her, on purpose to have the pleafure of feeing and touching me. They would often ftrip me naked from top to toe, and lay me at full length in their bofoms; wherewith I was much difgufted; because, to fay the truth, a very offenfive fmell came from their skins; which I do not mention, or intend, to the disadvantage of thofe excellent ladies, for whom I have all manner of refpect; but I conceive that my fenfe was more acute in proportion to my littleness, and that thofe illuftrious perfons were no more difagreeable to their lovers, or to each other, than people of the fame quality are with us in England. And, after all, I found their natural smell was much more fupportable, than when they used perfumes, under which I immediately fwooned away. I cannot forget, that an intimate friend of mine in Lilliput took the freedom in a warm day, when I had ufed a good deal of exercise, to complain of a strong smell about me, although I am as little faulty that way as most of my fex: but I fuppofe his faculty of smelling was as nice with regard to me, as mine was to that of this people. Upon this point I cannot forbear doing juftice to the queen my mistress, and Glumdalclitch my nurse, whofe perfons were as fweet as thofe of any lady in Eng

land.

That which gave me moft uneafinefs among these maids of honour (when my nurse carried me to vifit them) was to fee them ufe me without any manner of ceremony, like a creature who had no fort of confequence: for they would ftrip themfelves to the skin, and put on their fmocks in my prefence, while I was placed on their toilet, directly before their naked bodies, which I am fure to me was very far from being a tempting fight, or from giving me any other emotions than thofe of horror and difguft. Their skins appeared so coarse and uneven, so variously coloured, when I faw them near, with a mole here and there as broad as a trencher, and hairs hanging

from it thicker than pack-threads, to fay nothing farther concerning the reft of their perfons. Neither did they at all fcruple, while I was by, to difcharge what they had drank, to the quantity of at least two hogfheads, in a veffel that held above three tuns. The handfomeft among thefe maids of honour, a pleasant frolicfome girl of fixteen, would fometimes fet me aftride upon one of her nipples, with many other tricks, wherein the reader will excufe me for not being over particular. But I was fo much difpleafed, that I intreated Glumdalclitch to contrive fome excufe for not feeing that young lady any more.

One day a young gentleman, who was nephew to my nurfe's governefs, came and preffed them both to fee an execution. It was of a man, who had murdered one of that gentleman's intimate acquaintance. Glumdalclitch was prevailed on to be of the company, very much against her inclination, for fhe was naturally tenderhearted and as for myfelf, although I abhorred fuch kind of fpectacles, yet my curiofity tempted me to fee fomething, that I thought muft be extraordinary. The malefactor was fixed in a chair upon a scaffold erected for that purpofe, and his head cut off at one blow with a fword of about forty feet long. The veins and arteries fpouted up fuch a prodigious quantity of blood, and fo high in the air, that the great jet d'eau at Verfailles was not equal for the time it lafted; and the head, when it fell on the fcaffold floor, gave fuch a bounce as made me start, although I were at least half an English mile diftant.

The queen, who often used to hear me talk of my fea-voyages, and took all occafions to divert me when I was melancholy, afked me whether I understood how to handle a fail or an oar, and whether a little exercife of rowing might not be convenient for my health? I answered that I underftood both very well: for although my proper employment had been to be furgeon or doctor to the fhip, yet often upon a pinch I was forced to work like a common mariner. But I could not fee how this could be done in their country, where the smallest wherry was equal to a first-rate man of war among us, and fuch a boat as I could manage would never live in any of their ri vers. Her majefty faid, if I would contrive a boat, her own joiner should make it, and fhe would provide a place for me to fail in. The fellow was an ingenious workman, and by inftruction in ten days finished a pleasure

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a pleasure-boat, with all its tackling, able conveniently to hold eight Europeans. When it was finished the queen was fo delighted, that he ran with it in her lap to the king, who ordered it to be put in a cif tern full of water with me in it by way of trial, where I could not manage my two fculls, or little oars, for want of room. But the queen had before contrived another project. She ordered the joiner to make a wooden trough of three hundred feet long, fifty broad, and eight deep, which being well pitched, to prevent leaking, was placed on the floor along the wall in an outer room of the palace. It had a cock near the bottom to let out the water, when it began to grow ftale; and two fervants could easily fill it in half an hour. Here I often used to row for my own diverfion, as well as that of the queen and her ladies, who thought themfelves well entertained with my kill and agility. Sometimes I would put up my fail, and then my bufinefs was only to fteer, while the ladies gave me a gale with their fans: and, when they were weary, fome of the pages would blow my fail forward with their breath, while I fhewed my art by steering ftarboard or Jarboard, as I pleafed. When I had done, Glemdalclitch always carried back my boat into her clofet, and hung it on a nail to dry.

In this exercife I once met an accident which had like to have coft me my life: for, one of the pages having put my boat into the trough, the governess, who attended Glumdalclitch, very officiously lifted me up to place me in the boat, but I happened to flip through her fingers, and fhould infallibly have fallen down forty feet upon the floor, if, by the luckieft chance in the world, I had not been stopped by a corking-pin that fluck in the good gentlewo man's ftomacher; the head of the pin paffed between my shirt and the waistband of my breeches, and thus I was held by the middle in the air, till Glumdalclitch ran to my relief.

Another time, one of the fervants, whofe office it was to fill my trough every third day with fresh water, was fo careleis to let a huge frog (not perceiving it) flip out of his pail. The frog lay concealed till was put into my boat, but then feeing a reting place climbed up, and made it lean fo much on one fide, that I was forced to balance it with all my weight on the other to prevent overturning. When the frog was got in, it hopped at once half the

length of the boat, and then over my head, backwards and forwards, daubing my face and clothes with its odious flime. The largenefs of its features made it appear the moft deformed animal that can be conceived. However, I defired Glumdalclitch to let me deal with it alone. I banged it a good while with one of my fculls, and at laft forced it to leap out of the boat.

But the greatest danger I ever underwent in that kingdom, was from a monkey, who belonged to one of the clerks of the kitchen. Glumdalclitch had locked me up in her closet, while fhe went fomewhere upon business, or a vifit. The weather being very warm, the clofet-window was left open, as well as the windows and the door of my bigger box, in which I ufually lived, becaufe of its largenefs and conveniency. As I fat quietly meditating at my table, I heard fomething bounce in at the closet-window, and skip about from one fide to the other: whereat although I was much alarmed, yet I ventured to look out, but not ftirring from my feat; and then I faw this frolicfone animal frifking and leaping up and down, till at last he came to my box, which he seemed to view with great pleasure and curiofity, peeping in at the door and every window. I retreated to the farther corner of my room, or box, but the monkey looking in at every fide put me into fuch a fright, that I wanted prefence of mind to conceal myself under the bed, as I might eafily have done. After fome time spent in peeping, grin ning, and chattering, he at laft efpied me, and reaching one of his paws in at the door, as a cat does when the plays with a moufe, although I often shifted place to avoid him, he at length feized the lappet of my coat (which being of that country's filk, was very thick and firong) and dragged me out. He took me up in his right fore-fcot, and held me as a nurse does a child the is going to fuckle, just as I have feen the fame fort of creature do with a kitten in Europe: and when I offered to ftruggle, he fqueezed me fo hard, that I thought it more prudent to fubmit. I have good reafon to believe, that he took me for a young one of his own species, by his often ftroking my face very gently with his other paw. In thefe diverfions he was interrupted by a noife at the clo fet-door, as if fomebody was opening it; whereupon he fuddenly leaped up to the window, at which he had come in, and

thence

thence upon the leads and gutters, walking upon three legs, and holding me in the fourth, till he clambered up to a roof that was next to ours. I heard Glumdalclitch give a fhriek at the moment he was carrying me out. The poor girl was almoft distracted: that quarter of the palace was all in an uproar; the fervants ran for ladders; the monkey was feen by hundreds in the court, fitting upon the ridge of a building, holding me like a baby in one of his fore-paws, and feeding me with the other, by cramming into my mouth fome victuals he had fqueezed out of the bag on one fide of his chaps, and patting me when I would not eat; whereat many of the rabble below could not forbear laugh. ing; neither do I think they justly ought to be blamed, for, without queftion, the fight was ridiculous enough to every body but myself. Some of the people threw up ftones, hoping to drive the monkey down; but this was ftrictly forbidden, or elfe very probably my brains had been dafhed out.

The ladders were now applied, and mounted by feveral men, which the monkey obferving, and finding himself almost encompaffed; not being able to make fpeed enough with his three legs, let me drop on a ridge tile, and made his escape. Here I fat for fome time, five hundred yards from the ground, expecting every moment to be blown down by the wind, or to fall by my own giddinefs, and come tumbling over and over from the ridge to the eves: but an honeft lad, one of my nurfe's footmen, climbed up, and putting me into his breeches-pocket, brought me down fafe.

I was almost choaked with the filthy ftuff the monkey had crammed down my throat: but my dear little nurfe picked it out of my mouth with a fmail needle, and then I fell a vomiting, which gave me great relief. Yet I was fo weak, and bruifed in the fides with the fqueezes given me by this odious animal, that I was forced to keep my bed a fortnight. The king, queen, and all the court, fent every day to enquire after my health, and her majesty made me feveral vifits during my fickness. The monkey was killed, and an order made that no fuch animal should be kept about the palace.

When I attended the king after my recovery to return him thanks for his favours, he was pleased to rally me a good deal upon this adventure. He afked me what my

thoughts and fpeculations were while I lay in the monkey's paw; how I liked the victuals he gave me; his manner of feeding; and whether the fresh air on the roof had fharpened my ftomach. He defired to know, what I would have done upon fuch an occafion in my own country. I told his majefty, that in Europe we had no monkeys, except fuch as were brought for curiofities from other places, and fo fmall, that I could deal with a dozen of them together, if they prefumed to attack me. And as for that monftrous animal with whom I was fo lately engaged (it was indeed as large as an elephant) if my fears had fuffered me to think so far as to make ufe of my hanger (looking fiercely, and clapping my hand upon the hilt, as I fpoke) when he poked his paw into my chamber, perhaps I should have given him fuch a wound, as would have made him glad to withdraw it with more hafte than he put it in. This I delivered in a firm tone, like a person who was jealous left his courage fhould be called in question. However, my fpeech produced nothing elfe befides a loud laughter, which all the refpect due to his majefty from thofe about him could not make them contain. This made me reflect, how vain an attempt it is for a man to endeavour to do himfelf honour among thofe, who are out of all degree of equality or comparison with him. And yet I have feen the moral of my own behaviour very frequent in England fince my return, where a little contemptible varlet, without the leaft title to birth, perfon, wit, or common fenfe, thall prefume to look with importance, and put himself upon a foot with the greatest perfons of the kingdom.

I was every day furnishing the court with fome ridiculous ftory; and Glumdalclitch, although he loved me to excess, yet was arch enough to inform the queen, whenever I committed any folly that she thought would be diverting to her majesty. The girl, who had been out of order, was carrried by her governefs to take the air about an hour's diftance, or thirty miles from town. They alighted out of the coach near a fmall foot-path in a field, and Glumdalclitch fetting down my travellingbox, I went out of it to walk. There was a cow-dung in the path, and I must needs. try my activity by attempting to leap over it. I took a run, but unfortunately jumped fhort, and found myself juft in the middle up to my knees. I waded through