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say that I am enabled wholly to give up my own will to your's in this matter. How heartily do I wish your mind to be satisfied, and pray that the LORD may direct you so, that you may enjoy ease and comfort, as the result of that tenderness of conscience, which induced you so unweariedly to seek to know his mind and will on this subject. -. - ... - - - - - - - - - - - And now, my beloved husband, after once more commending you to the never ceasing care of a covenant God, I will conclude, by subscribing myself for the first time, Your unworthy, but truly affectionate wife,
Margate, Jan. 21, 1798. Thanks to my dearest love, for his unex. pected kind remembrance of me, and thanks to the LORD for having put it in your power to communicate the welcome tidings of your safe arrival at R Ere this you will, in all probability, have had my letter, which would inform you of our welfare ; and I have reason to be thankful that this leaves us quite as well as we were then. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Remember William's book, or get some information on what he should be taught at his age. I do indeed daily feel myself so very ignorant, that I should be thankful to gain information on this subject. ---. . -------------I feel so barren of any thing to say, which might be profitable, that I am quite discouraged in the attempt to write, sometimes when one has little room and opportunity, our inclinations and abilities for writing seem the greater. Surely in all respects the evil of our hearts and the temptations of our spiritual enemies are more predominant than we suspect or are aware of: all speaks loudly to us
to watch and pray.-To those duties how shamefully backward we feel!—Oh, what a load of sin and corruption do we groan under, so that we cannot do the thing that we would!—Evil is continually present with us, nor do we the thing which we promise ourselves that we will do.
The Lord lays his hand on us—he makes us to feel the rod, and whilst we are under its smart, uncertain as to the issue of our affliction, whether by life or death ; Oh! how do we chide ourselves for our past untoward behaviour to the LORD and
that if he delivers us but this once, we will be decidedly for him and not another. The affliction vanishing, too oft do our resolutions also vanish with it; and we are again left to bemoan and lament, saying that a deceiving, a divided heart hath turned us aside!—The LORD sees all this, he takes cognizance of every secret work and imagination; and how
displeasing must be the sight! he looks, and reasonably expects (speaking after the manner of men) that we should bring forth grapes—but, behold, are they not wild grapes ? — Is there any part of our conduct whereof he can say, I have pleasure in this? I am speaking, (though I say us and our's) of myself alone.—My own heart speaks true, and tells me that in all things I am far inferior to him whom I am addressing. There is nothing in myself that I have to plead, why or wherefore the LORD should have any mercy on such an one. We know but little of ourselves; yet enough to humble us in the very dust before the LORD. Now I shall conclude—The LORD bless, preserve and keep you, my dearest love, and in his own due time return you in health and perfect safety to, Your truly affectionate wife,
M. C. My tenderest love to our dear boy.
Margate, April 25, 1798. Though I should be able to devote but a few minutes to my dearest love, believe me it is with much pleasure that I avail myself of them to drop you a few lines,-thankful to have it in my power to inform you
that this, through mercy, leaves me quite well.
I hope my dearest love was preserved through the silent watches of the night, and safely conducted to the end of his journey.
How I miss your company, conversation and attentions, and look forward with longing hopes and expectations for their return!How inexpressibly deep are my obligations to that God and Father of mercies, who almost wrought a miracle, in permitting our hands to be joined together!-Let us not, because the time is long since past and gone,